Damned: Chapter 37) In the Shallow

I knew in my heart that leaving wouldn’t have been the right thing to do. It probably was the wise thing, but not the right thing. I held myself up painfully and entered the house where I saw the lifeless body of Marc on the ground. He didn’t deserve this. His son didn’t deserve this. As best and respectfully as I could, I pulled and dragged the body out regardless if I was bleeding myself, and dragged him under the tree where his wife’s grave was beneath. Within that moment, I slumped to the ground. The feeling was numb and there was nothing I could do anymore. I hated it. I hated how helpless and how unfair this situation was. Part of me hated myself because I felt like this was my fault. I shouldn’t have gotten involved with him, with anyone. Everyone I go to, I put them in danger. I never cried so much over a dead man’s body. Literally. The sudden wash of anger and frustration swept across me giving me chills. It was painful.

I felt cold and damp, my consciousness was slipping in and out like a flickering light. The feel of someone’s arms wrapped around me and lifted me. My throat felt dry and sore, no words were able to come out. I wasn’t even able to move. The voice of the individual seemed familiar and all I remember him muttering was ‘Jesus’ before he scooped me up.

The sound of a loud horn caused me to painstakingly and slowly rip my eyelids open. I was in a moving vehicle as I noted Natalia with a damp wet cloth soaked in blood. It seemed like she was wiping the blood off me but I snapped my hand back, away from her in caution. Nikolai looked at me through the mirror as he drove, along with my brother in the passenger seat next to him.

“Are you alright, Katherine?” he asked.

“Stop the car.” I mumbled in alarm, “Stop it.”

“Katherine-” Natalia tried to touch my shoulder but I slapped her hand away.

“Don’t touch me. Stay away from me. All of you.” I struggled, wanting to jump out of the moving car. I didn’t trust them, not even my so-called brother.

“Pirahna! You’re okay. You’re safe.” I felt the person whom I was leaning on shake me a little to face him.

“Moe.” I breathed, hugging him, “Marc’s dead.”

“I know,” he frowned as I pulled away slightly and saw the worry which plagued his face.

“Where’s James?”

“I don’t know.”

“Kat, what happened there?” Anthony asked.

Turning to him, I noticed Natalia’s concerned look at the side and Nikolai giving a short worried glimpse.

“You act like you’re not aware.” I hissed.

“Katherine, I am not your enemy.” He mirrored back.

“Really? I beg to differ.” I scoffed.

“I understand how you feel Katherine, you have every right not to trust us, but right now you have no choice but to. I’m sorry what happened to Marc, but staying together is the best option.” Natalia sighed, “God forbid things to get worse.”

“Then where to?” Nikolai asked.

She turned to look out the window and frowned, “I don’t know anymore.”

“There’s a Motel nearby.” Moe instructed, “We’ll go there.”

I honestly lost track of the time quite frankly but that was the least of my worries. We all went up to one of the rooms where we stayed together. My brother, Moe, and Nikolai went downstairs to speak with the owner while Natalia and I stayed back. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I noted her draining face as she sat on the sofa a few feet away. It was unlike her confident and well-kept demeanor.

“So,” I began as I drank the bottled water Moe gave me in the car, “I would like if things start making sense now. Maybe you can start?”

“How are you feeling?”

“Confused. I want answers, Natalia. Why did you help me? Why are you here?”

“You remind me of her.” She said in a faint voice.

“What?”

“My younger sister. She’s died in a fire back home along with my mother. That’s when Vitaly’s father took me in, also my father. For years I blamed him until recently I came to realize that he was only doing what Ded asked him to do.”

“Why wasn’t he with you all this time?”

“Who? My father?” she asked with a soft bitter laugh, “Because my mother was nothing but his mistress. I never thought he had any genuine love for her. All he had done was provide for us.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why? Because one woman went unloved in this world? Many go unloved Katherine, yet they still survive. My mother had the resources, she was a quite capable woman without love.”

 “Vitaly’s mother seems to suffer.”

Her eyes shot up when I said that, “You met her?”

“I did.”

“She’s unstable, Katherine. As far as I know, Vitaly sends the best doctors and help he can to her.”

“Well, maybe she just wants her son to visit more frequently rather than a doctor.”

“Exactly. Now, do you see what I’m saying, Katherine? He’s making the same mistake his father made years ago. He’s becoming a puppet to Ded.”

“Why?”

Standing, she walked towards the window and looked outside, “He gave up a long time ago, you’re aware of that right?”

“Gave up on what?” I frowned.

“Of trying, Katherine. He has no purpose other than listening to his Grandfather and heeding his instruction. Yet, at times, when Vitaly makes decisions it frightens me because I know that’s not what he was. Ever since Ded made him kill a man while he was only seventeen, that’s when things began to change. He’s a broken man Katherine, sometimes some things are better left that way.”

“How can you say that? He’s your brother.”

“It’s his decision. He has a choice but right now I know he’s conflicted and you don’t want to be around him like that. It’s better this way. It’s safer.”

“Why did his mother call my mother’s name? How does she know my mother?”

Natalia turned back at me and frowned as I said that, “What did she tell you?”

I stood and firmed my position, “You know, don’t you?”

Lowering her eyes, she turned to the side, “Vitaly’s father was in love with your mother. They were in love with each other.”

“What?” I stood there in shock.

“Don’t get scared, Vitaly isn’t your brother.”

“How do you know all this?”

“Before Vitaly’s father was murdered by Gianmarco, he used to write letters to your mother even after her death. I guess he was trying to cope. Of course, the letter never reached her, Ded used to hide them all. That’s where I found them, in his office in one of the locked drawers. And no, Vitaly and no one else is aware of this.”

“This is too much right now.” I fell back sitting on the edge of the bed.

“What’s too much?” Moe’s voice suddenly interrupted as he entered with Anthony.

“I think Katherine deserves some rest,” Natalia spoke.

Taking a deep breath, I plopped myself down on one of the two queen size beds in the room, “I think Katherine deserves more than a rest. She deserves a nice big juicy burger, some greasy fries, and a large coke, thank you very much.”

“And perhaps Katherine should stop being a smart ass and try not to talk about herself in the third person because we are all stressed here as well.” Anthony bitched.

“And I think she can do whatever the hell she wants because she has been through enough.” Natalia angrily retorted at him.

“You’re behaving like this is my fault” he hissed at her while she held a murderous look towards him.

“Isn’t it?”

“Oh wow,” Moe gave a short-interested laugh and flopped himself on the separate bed while grabbing the pack of complimentary nuts to the side, “This is getting nutty.”

I wanted to say something to stop them right now but I didn’t have the strength to. Besides, Anthony was upsetting me either way.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means you’ve been nothing but a coward all this time. You ran away like the little boy you are, put your sister in danger, and let me remind you that you used me to get the damn folder.” She venomously stated in her thick Russian accent.

“I did what I had to do to keep everyone safe.”

“You mean yourself!”

“Don’t raise your voice.” He stated.

“I can do whatever the fuck I want to do. You don’t get to tell me what to do! I trusted you, I loved you and you went behind my back, nothing was real. You’re as disgusting as your actions.”

Moe whistled and threw some nuts at Anthony from the bed, “Booooo,” he shamed him, “Shame on you.”

First, the fact that I just heard that Natalia was in a relationship with my brother would have explained why she seemed so familiar with my surname in the beginning, and secondly, I was hella shook.

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