Damned: Chapter 50) Even After the Odds

With that, I shrugged away from her and walked towards Archer and for the very first time, I felt an immense sense of happiness upon seeing him after his absence. Tears seemed to build within my eyes as I neared him and fell into an embrace that probably shocked my own being. I somehow needed his comfort and was fighting the urge to not cry in front of so many people around.

“Why did you come back so late? I was worried.” The words slipped out and perhaps a tear. Those wretched things.

“I didn’t know you would have minded.” He said honestly as he studied my pained face. “What happened?” His mood suddenly taking a serious tone, “Did someone say something to you? Why are you sad?”

“Devereux,” I heard Moe’s voice behind me. I didn’t even know Natalia invited him but I was so immensely happy to see him again. I looked around to see if I could have spotted James but alas most men wore those fancy son-of-a-biscuit masks. Nice call. Personality first party.

Moe patted me gently on the back as he spoke to Archer, “Right, Piranha?”

“What?” I asked snapping back to their attention. Moe gave me a questioning yet worried look as Natalia walked up to us with a polite smile.

Excusing myself, I went to the bar and contented myself with the finger food and wine. Lots and lots of wine.

“Kills it doesn’t it?” A man said from beside me, wearing a partial mask, “Marc always used to say, pain makes life beautiful because it’s a way of making us stronger for tomorrow. But a temporary relief is only for a coward.”

I smiled at his words recollecting his voice in my head, “Marc must have been a wonderful man.”

“He was and one of my closest friends. Shall I have this dance? For him?” James asks as he puts out his hand.

Pleasantly, I danced with him and it almost felt as if he was trying to sober me back up before someone else asked for a dance. Dance after dance and my feet were getting sore. Many of Archer’s friends seemed to somehow have ‘taken a liking to me’ as Archer said in a somewhat cautious manner when he pulled me aside but I assured him that they weren’t my type. God even knows what my type was. Walking back to the bar, I had another drink and because I was a “lady” and most importantly Archer’s long-lost little sister, I had to upkeep a decent reputation- wine- no beer for me. Also meaning, I couldn’t kick that one guy violently to smash his banana when he tried to slide his hand down the equator.

“I’m not sure if you’re trying to get drunk or sober.” A man said to me from the side.

“Is both an option?”

“Only if you’re trying to kill yourself.” He stated with a soft short laugh and held out his hand towards me. “But if you truly wish to taint your soul, dance with me.”

“Ouu scaryyy,” I find myself saying aloud. “Do you say that to all your victims or is it just me?”

Taking my hand, he pulled me closer to him gently swaying me gracefully. Yet nothing was graceful because I was tipsy AF. Damn, he was tall and well built.

“So what school do you attend?” I asked.

“Excuse me?”

“I saidddd, do you eat soup? Or do you drink soup?”

Everything felt so fuzzy but his arms felt so right, his embrace burned through my clothes and hell was he solid. I felt as if I was being pulled aside when the noise of the party got fainter and fainter.

“Please,” I begged, burying my face in his shirt as I sobbed. “Don’t leave me. Please don’t go.”    

Pulling slightly away, I felt his thumb grazed gently along my trembling plump lower lip- tilting my chin to him while his other hand stroked my hair in the most sensational manner. My eyes were foggy and all I could do was needlessly crave for his man to never stop holding me with him right now.

“I don’t want to feel this anymore, please make it stop.” I shamefully begged as I felt lips upon mine, the man intertwining and softly tugging at my hair as I clutched onto his shirt- his lips dancing with mine like it was so ridiculously easy.

An uneasy ached suddenly did a somersault within my stomach, forcing me to pull away with a horrid taste of regret and desperation tugging at my lips- desperation that it was Vitaly but the truth was that he’s dead. A morbid feeling washed over me, I couldn’t even look the man in his eyes, I felt so eternally disgusted with myself and shame blanketed my every essence, “I’m so sorry,” I fought back the powerful tears that were threatening to fall. “Oh, God. This was a mistake. God no. I-”

Choking on my sobs, I ran out of the room and took the exit at the back of the building as my cheeks soaked with pain. Bringing myself to a bench at the side of the park outside in a quiet area I brought my knees to my chin then buried my face crying, sobbing, and choking on my embarrassment. God, I missed him. To make matters worst I felt soft drops of rain turn to pebbled against my shoulders and body as I painfully drained myself dry. Pulling out Vitaly’s necklace from my pocket I clutched it tightly apologizing and praying for the pain- the agony- to stop.

The rain that was hitting against my bare shoulder seemed to ease and I heard a voice near me almost in a pained plea, “Please stop this.”

Turning slightly, I saw the man holding an umbrella above me.

“You don’t understand, it’s all my fault. I never understood him. I shouldn’t have shouted, God I should have seen it.”

“Nothing is your fault. Please, I’m asking you again, you’ll get sick if you don’t go inside.”

“No. I don’t care.” I sobbed as the man’s body tensed beside mine. “Being dead is better than this.”

“It’s just alcohol. You’re drunk, that’s all. Go back inside.” His voice was hot and stern.

“No.”

“Why the hell not?”

“No. I won’t. I deserve to get sick, I deserve to die. I never even got to tell him and as bad as this may sound, I truly and genuinely fell-” I choked in a sob before I could finish it. “I can’t do it anymore. The memories are too much. I wish I could just kill my-”

“Don’t you fking dare!” The man threw the umbrella at the side and scrambled me forcefully up to him as he stood as well- seething angrily, “Don’t you dare to fking think of hurting yourself.”

I stood shocked at how aggressive his words formed against me and through the partial mask I saw the deepest iciest shade of fiery blue reflect through the moonlight. The raging storm through his eyes burned daggers at my heart. Tightening the space between us, I felt that sense of ease wash over me as I touched his face.

“God forgive me for putting you through this, Angel.”

I slapped him so painfully firm.

My hand ached as his face flexed to the side from the impact, causing his mask to fall off.

“I deserved that.” His voice low and achingly pained.

“All this time…” I began as tears streamed down my cheeks and I pushed him vigorously at his torso. “Was this a joke to you?”

“What kind of monster do you think I am? Do you think I wanted this? Hell, I did everything for you.” He settled his voice. “For your sake. I just- this- I hadn’t expected this.”

“What?” I breathed as I felt my body sway but he steadied me in his arms. He locked exhausted eyes onto mine and I felt the longing through them.

“Me being with you would have been dangerous, Katherine. I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you because of my selfish decision.”

“James knew, didn’t he? You were with him that day when you went after Vincelli.” I strained my voice to even speak.

With a pause, “Yes, but I couldn’t get you involved anymore. Katrina, you have this life ahead of you. It’s a great life, why are you looking back?”

“Because you’re there.”

“Katherine,” he breathed, stunned at that, his eyes softening. “You have my heart. You’ll always do. I’m perplexed as to what you see in a monster like me but maybe that’s why I’m so drawn to you. You see me as virtuously human and I feel otherwise and somehow or the other you see me as worthy and I could never understand your kindness. I love you, fk, you make me so weak.”

Slipping my hand into his, I closed the space between us, pressing my body against his and head against his chest. His heartbeat was fast and steady as he wrapped his free hand around me and then pushed the strands of wet hair out of my face, combing his fingers through his.

“You’re going to fall ill if you stay out here anymore,” He managed to say in what seemed to be the most concerned and caring voice, at this point, I questioned if this was the real Vitaly.

Ignoring that, I smiled sweetly at him, “At least you’re with me.”

“You’re really drunk, aren’t you?” He teased in a soft laugh.

“Wanna taste to find out?” I asked in a sobbed laugh.

He seemed to be slightly taken by that and the hint of a subtle grin crept up, perching the corners of his lips upwards, “First you slap me then you ask me for this.” He chuckled as he pressed his lips against mine, stapling my body back to his, devouring me into his every being. His rich perfumed spicy scent danced and lingered through me as I clutched onto his shirt, somehow afraid to lose him again. Baby angels seemed to dance inside my tummy as he deepened the kiss into something rawer and impeccably intimate that I felt as if our souls were touching each other quite literally. And when it ended, I felt as if my heart and spirit were craving for more. He frowned down upon me as he noted my expression and cupped my cheeks in his hands.

“Don’t cry, it kills me when you do.”

“Then stay,” I whispered feeling my chest contract. “Please.”

He was silent as the rain eased but I knew he was contemplating the risks involved, “I hadn’t accounted for this. I hadn’t even meant to meet you tonight. For two years James and I have been working with the committee in tracking down men like Vincelli, you may hate me but I couldn’t put your life in danger like that and as much as I wanted to meet you after I heard you came out of the coma, God himself couldn’t keep me away from you. And even though the contract is expired with the committee, I’m still concerned about the aftermath. Katherine, I can’t live with myself if something happened to you again. Jesus, I can’t. Being away from you is one thing but watching you suffer is going to truly kill me.”

“This is suffering. Being without you hurts me more than you can imagine. Please,” I begged with teary eyes, “Leave the past behind, you’re only hurting yourself. At the end of the day, everyone gets hurt Vitaly. You want to protect me from yourself and your past but you can’t protect me from death at the end of the day, it’s going to happen sooner or later, I just want to spend whatever time I have with you. So please Vitaly, I love you, don’t do this to yourself. Please stay, for me.”

He grazed his thumb gently against my cheeks and smiled, “If this is what you want. I will.”

And suddenly, I felt the lights dim around me, the sounds fade and I swayed to the fading voice of someone calling my name. And there was nothing but darkness engulf me.

 I shot up at the edge of a plush bed, gasping for air. I was back at my apartment which I shared with Natalia.

No.

No no no, it can’t be a dream. No, please no.

I turned to get off the bed but tumbled down, hitting my face flat on the ground. I groaned as I felt a strong arm wrap around me, helping me up. Vitaly frowned deeply and crossly at me as he pushed me gently to sit on the bed. God, this was real. It wasn’t a dream. Bloody hell, I was in heaven. I couldn’t help but noticed how wickedly the sunshine licked the edges of his dark tousled hair, and how snug his crisp white shirt clung to his body, contouring to his defined torso with his rolled-up sleeves, or how his facial hair seemed to grow slightly unkempt yet still highlighted how sculpted his face was marbled into. Ridiculously overwhelming in beauty he was.

I raised my hand to touch his face when he stopped me with a scowl, “You do realize how ridiculously idiotic your decisions have been thus far.”

“Falling in love with you must be number one on that list.” I innocently smiled. His eyes seemed to flicker when I said that but he plastered that serious expression and brought a glass of water to my lips.

“Drink,” He scolded. And somehow I had to listen. “Why the hell didn’t you eat yesterday?”

I shrugged.

“For Christ’s sake, even if I chose to leave you left me with no chose but to drag your ass back inside to Archer and Natalia.” He continued heatedly as he grabbed the bowl of oats from the side and placed it in front of me, between us.

That must have been a shock. Damn, and to think I was knocked out in the good part.

“Where is everyone?” I managed to ask.

“Left me to babysit my stubborn baby,” He iced on the stubborn and brought the spoon of oat to my lips as I frowned.

“I detest oats.”

“Lucky for you I don’t care.” He winked. “Now eat, it’s good for you. You need strength if you want to be with me.”

“Oh HAR HAR,” I scoffed in a laugh. “What are you going to do, stuff it down my throat?”

The idea seemed to spread a delicious smile across his face, “Doesn’t sound too bad.”

“You can’t force me to have oats, Alecovich.” I tasted his name in my mouth, “Oats equal suffering.”

“Then,” he chuckled, leaning in on me and rousingly trialed his lips against my neck feverishly and slowly up to my ear, “I’ll make sure you enjoy this type of suffering.”

And quite honestly, oats didn’t sound that bad after all.

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The roof was wetter than she was tonight. Heavy raindrops pounded on, turning into a storm of desire and frustration. He was gone longer than she’d expected. Not a single call. The past few days with these unwanted guests in her house made her uneasy to say the least. Yet, wanted by her husband. Who the hell told him he could make a decision like that without her? God, he frustrated the shit out of her. God, did she love him anyway.

Elizabeth twirled her wedding ring around her delicate finger and shifted restlessly on the empty bed. The feeling of loneliness crept up between her legs. She shifted again. The nerve that man had to leave her here like this for days. She was thirsty. Really thirsty. The bottles at the bedside table had all been drained from earlier today. She hated cramps with a passion. She hated when he wasn’t around her when she felt like this.

Deciding to refill the water mug, she pushed herself off the bed and threw over a white shirt of her husband’s. This was the closest she felt to him in days, somehow it warmed her heart. Brushing her fingertips over the assortment of his cologne, she opted for her favourite. Musky. Dark. Sensual. Charming. Everything she’d describe Sebastian Lockwick to be.

The lights of the hall had been buried in darkness, yet the moonlight fought through the windows which luminated the moon-crest sloped staircase. The warm soles of her feet licked the icy marble beneath her as she made her way into the kitchen. Her eyes burned from the lack of sleep and worry. Men.

The sound of the ice maker suddenly startled her, causing her to spill the water she was pouring into a glass. “Shit.” As she pressed the rim of the glass to her lips, the sound of a hushed door closing grasped her attention. 11:55pm. Who could have been down here so late? Was someone breaking in? Surely, she could have handled the situation herself. Grabbing a hold on the nearest knife at the counter, she carefully trailed towards the sound.

A blanket of silence fell upon her at the sight of her husband drenched in blood, white shirt now wine, the tang of metallic red sin caressed her nose, his hair soaked in thick salted sweat and blood that slicked to his forehead. His eyes, however, reflected from the moonlight in its majestic silver blue. Elizabeth frowned deeply as he stalked towards her and stood inches apart.  

“Well, you’re bloody late.” She broke the silence, annoyed.

Sebastian gave out a low chuckle, astonished at his wife’s dry humor, “A pun? Really?”

“How dare you leave me here like this,” she softly raged, bringing the knife up to his throat, “How fucking dare you.”

“Love,” he cooed into her left ear, and pulled her tenderly by the waist, clasping the spaces between them. “I missed you too.”

“Are you forgetting the knife in my hand, Sebastian?” She warned.

“Go ahead, stab me.”

Sighing, she dropped it and wrapped her arms around his red moist neck. Swiftly, scooping her into his arms and perching her upon the kitchen’s island. “I should get cleaned up,” he suggested, “I don’t want you getting ill.”

“No, no. I’m not waiting anymore,” Elizabeth breathed shortly, locked her legs around him. Pressing her lips onto his, she’d slip her tongue in through smiles. He tasted like blood and vodka. Whose blood was this? She hadn’t even known. His hands travelled along her naked legs, as she moaned into him. Up. Up. Pulling away slightly, she kept an arm’s length, breathed, and slapped him across the face.

“You’re upset. I shouldn’t have left like that. I know. Things got… complicated.” He motioned to his drenched attire.

***

If you love mystery, dark romance, unhinged/ morally grey characters, crazy unpredictable plot twists, Gillian Flynn sort of novels with romance in it, then I think you will LOVE ‘Ophelia’. I actually cried writing it because I love one of the male love interest so damn much and -well- it’s a lot to explain. And I genuinely believe you will enjoy the crazy ride of that storyline! You just read the prologue, here’s the completed story!

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